Then it became this thing of gathering friends - ooh who is she friends with? I vaguely know him , we met once, therefore I MUST send a friend request....ooh, who has requested me? We lived in the same town? Good enough, accept friend!
Then it became an accepted forum to announce births, deaths and marriages....I know the act of writing a letter went out with the ice-age, but even Alexander Graham Bell is turning in his grave that we don't even pick up the phone anymore...
Now what I am saying is MY opinion. I think it is lovely to share photos of your child with friends etc, and I do enjoy looking at how my friends babies are growing, or which party they went to, and it is kinda cool since being in the arse end of nowhere (which I LOVE by the way) , to keep up with the comings and goings of all our friends in London. And I know life is SO SO busy that having something like Facebook makes it easy to send a quick hello, or like, or comment. But special things still deserve at least a phonecall right?
The last straw for me came when one of Mr A.'s friends sent me a friend request. I have met her once nearly ten years ago, and am very correct in remembering that she did not even like me....so why would I want to be your friend? And why do you want to be mine? Mr A. and I had a huge debate about this, and how rude it is or not to decline her request...but regardless of which side of the table you stand, it spurred me to prune my Facebook friends......by half! I made the decision to keep the friends who do phone, or we do see, or I have spoken to in say the last five years!?! It was wonderfully cathartic, and the right choice for me. I don't get how Mr A. with his gazillion friends can possibly keep track of them all - who's doing what, with whom, and where? I am perfectly happy with my 60-odd friends, I can stalk them with complete ease.
But since then another issue has arisen : How much should one rant on Facebook? If you have had a hard day and perhaps your judgement is slightly skewed, should you write something that can come back and bite you in the arse? The scary thing is that you can know someone who isn't even on Facebook, or hardly logs on but they suddenly know all about it....your status update becomes a talking point ( I refrain from saying gossip,as I like to think my friends are better than that)
A friend, after having a hard few weeks had a little rant, and it caused more than a ripple in our little circle. Now me being me, do not learn from this and just a few days later step on my own landmine. I had a REALLY crappy day, and wrote my opinion on boys - I am not overly fond of them. But I guess without knowing the background it does come across harshly. Now, don't get me wrong, there are boys in my life I adore - My nephew being trumps, but I love my friends' boys, I am emotionally invested in them. But, (she says teetering on knife-edge) some boys really give the gender a bad name. I am being honest in saying I am just not a boy kinda girl. So, to all my friends who drew in a collective gasp when you read my status: the odds are definitely in your favour that I really DO like your little boy, please realise that I did have a little rant, and if you were to phone me to call me up on it, I can give you the background, apologise and then have a good old chinwag!
I keep on thinking perhaps I should just deactivate my account - I have another friend who did that...she agrees with me that we have lost our touch to an electronic forum so withdrew her account for a while. The result? Her phone rang off the hook, and emails flooded her inbox - she really caught up with her friends good and proper. The way it should be perhaps? I don't know, this is just me and these are just my thoughts, and so far, the only conclusion I have reached is this:
Facebook is Marmite - you either love it or hate it!
